There are “friends” who destroy each other,
but a real friend sticks closer than a brother. – Proverbs 18:24
Whenever we journey closely with others, we’ll usually end up having soul ties with them. Often, this is a good and godly thing. God wants us to have these healthy soul ties so that we can grow closer to Him.
When we journey on our own, we can only go that far spiritually. But once we start journeying with others who can help and guide us, we begin to go even further than we can imagine.
After David had finished talking with Saul, he met Jonathan, the king’s son. There was an immediate bond between them, for Jonathan loved David. 1 Samuel 18:1
Although many of us have broken soul ties and struggle to form deep friendships, we’re designed and placed here to grow and connect deeply with each other.
But what happens if these friendships get broken or damaged?
Good friendships can start off well and end up badly. It can go from something that’s godly to something that’s evil and damaging for our soul.
When we don’t deal with these broken soul ties, we’ll end up carrying the baggage with us into our other friendships.
“It seems like I can’t have a real friendship these days.” Sarah said.
“Were there any close friendships that ended poorly in the past? Anything that you try to brush aside and never really dealt with?” Julie asked.
“Susan was like a sister, a mentor to me for five years. When things didn’t work out between us, we decided to just move on but I guess I’ve never fully recovered from it.” Sarah said.
“It seems like the soul tie that you’ve build over the years is still there. The friendship was broken off but you’re still trying to hold on to it.” Julie said.
“You can break off this soul tie by blessing Susan and releasing the past relationship. Let’s spend a few minutes blessing her, her job and her family. Keep doing this whenever you have to.”
By blessing Susan, Sarah was able to release the soul tie and find healing in this area of her life.
Instead of hanging on to the past, she was able to bless Susan and release the soul tie.
If you’re struggling with soul ties related to past friendships, you can release it by blessing your friend, her family, her job or anything you can think of through healing prayer.
“Today, I want to bless Susan. I ask that You pour Your favor into her life, her work, her ministry and her family. I pray that she will continue to be a blessing to people around her, just as she has been a blessing to me over the years.”
Soul ties with the world
Who we hang out with the most will affect our lives and our future. We will most likely become like the people that we’re closest to and those we spend the most time with due to the soul ties that we have with them.
Don’t be fooled by those who say such things, for “bad company corrupts good character. - 1 Corinthians 15:33
When we grow soul ties with those who have bad character, we will inevitably become like them. That’s why we have to carefully consider who we will have soul ties with. What this means is we can love and reach out to anyone but when it comes to close friendships where we allow soul ties to take place, we have to carefully and prayerfully choose the right people.
Don’t copy the behavior and customs of this world, but let God transform you into a new person by changing the way you think. Then you will learn to know God’s will for you, which is good and pleasing and perfect. – Romans 12:2
If you want to know God’s will for your life, don’t allow yourself to become like the world or your mind to think like the world. Instead, allow your mind to be transformed by His word. Hang out with people who are after God’s will and you will become more like them.
To remove the mindset of the world, start by removing the voices of the world that keep speaking into your life – it can be social media, ads, tv or the internet. Don’t allow your life to be programmed by the values of the world. Most people live believing that they need to do what everyone else is doing based on the values of the world. This is being programmed by the world.
Instead, let God transform you. This will involve intentionally creating time and space each day to dwell in His presence and listen to His voice. The more time you spend with Him, the more He will transform your life. So, make this a priority no matter how busy life gets.
Don’t team up with those who are unbelievers. How can righteousness be a partner with wickedness? How can light live with darkness? - 2 Corinthians 6:14
How do we love people and still not have soul ties with them?
We’re called to love everyone but that does not mean opening our soul to have soul ties with anyone.
Having soul ties with someone is a matter of choices. We choose to walk closely with others, we choose to allow them to have influence over our minds and hearts and we choose to spend time with them.
The best way for us to help others is to take care of our own soul first. Only then will be able to reach out and bless others.
We can love our neighbors, spend time with them over dinner, go to movies with them – but we choose whether or not to have soul ties with them.